Alright, this is big news for a lot of people – following in the footsteps of Brock Lesnar and Bobby Lashley, CM Punk is the latest former-WWE star to jump over to the world of mixed martial arts! I’m looking forward to seeing this; despite Punk being 36, his personality seems wily and cunning, so I think he can use his brains to be effective in the octagon. That said, as he himself states, it’s now or never for him, and while he plainly states that this is his new career, a poor debut showing could see that it is a very short career indeed. This is less of a review, and more an opportunity to get this transcript up, so you can check out the announcement yourself. Let me know what you think of Punk (Phil Brooks now?) linking up with Dana White and co.; how do you think he’ll do? What weight would you like to see him at? Who would you like to see him fight?

Joe Rogan: Alright ladies and gentlemen, I am here with none other than CM Punk. If you are a fan of professional wrestling, you know this man, but your wrestling days are over – you have decided to enter the octagon and fight mixed martial arts professionally.

CM Punk: Yeah, well, I’d say my professional wrestling days are over, I’m sure I’ll have to do lots of wrestling in there! It’s very awesome to be here. It’s very awesome to be here.

JR: How long — I know you’ve been training with Rener and Ryron Gracie for quite a while, you’ve been around the UFC for quite a while. How long have you been contemplating this, and what ultimately influenced your decision?

CM: You know, this is something that’s been in the back of my mind for a very, very long time. I have a background in kenpo. I’ve done Brazilian jiu-jitsu off and on for a very, very long time. But the idea of being able to step in the Octagon and find out what’s inside myself and test myself is an opportunity I was not able to deny myself. I don’t think I would be able to live myself — live with myself — if I didn’t give this a shot.

JR: So is this something that, watching people like Brock Lesnar become very successful in the UFC; seeing all the fights, seeing it live, you just felt like it’s just now or never, you only have a certain amount of time in this life.

CM: Yeah, I mean, I felt like it was now or never about three years ago. I resigned with the WWE, and I tried to give that the old college try, and it is now or never for me. I have a limited window just like all fighters do and I fully intend to get in there, and I’m here for a fight; I’m either here to get my ass kicked, or kick somebody’s ass.

JR: Now is this a one-time adventure, or are you considering this as your new career?

CM: No, this is my new career, 100%. I’m going to go full steam ahead, all systems go after today, and it’s going to be fun. I have nothing but respect for everybody here in the UFC, everybody who steps into the octagon to fight. When all is said and done, when I’m finished, everybody is going to have to respect me, because I have come here to fight.

JR: And what weight will you be competing at?

CM: That is something that is up in the air, you know, most likely middleweight? I’m going to do a test weight cut, see how I feel, and the option, I think, for welterweight might be there, but certainly not light-heavyweight.

JR: And what camp will you be training out of, who will you be training with for this?

CM: That’s something you’re going to have to stay tuned for. You know, I’ve talked to a few people, but I didn’t want to tip my hat as to why I was actually enquiring with certain camps, I didn’t want to give it away; I wanted to make sure today was like the launch. Now that this is public, you’ll probably find out very soon where I’m going to go.

JR: Well this is very exciting, it’s very gutsy of you to do.

CM: I’m very excited!

JR: I can tell you’re very thrilled! I’m excited to call your fight, I can’t wait to see you inside there, and good luck to you sir.

CM: Luck is for losers Joe Rogan, thank you very much!

JR: Luck is for losers says CM Punk! I’ll take as much luck as I can get!


I’d just like to apologise for never getting the Twin Peaks “Traces to Nowhere” review up. I’ll get on that soon…hopefully!

Right okay, here’s something new for you. The intense build up for this long anticipated rematch is about to come to a head here in Liverpool, and I’m on hand to cover the whole event! There is, of course, a caveat here (hence the asterisk) – I know very little about scoring in boxing. I had initially intended to give a brief play-by-play for each round, but I realised that my lack of knowledge would limit this greatly, so I’ll give a little recap of each bout; I can probably stretch to that. Without further ado, let’s get into this.

Fight one: McDonnell defeats Chacon by referee stoppage due to a dislocated shoulder [TKO10] (Prediction: McDonnell)

I have to be honest, I accidentally put Chacon as my prediction, and I apologise for that if you think it’s a bit of a cop-out in changing it. Genuinely typed the wrong name though – my bad. It has been corrected now (following the Quigg bout – better late than never eh?), we’re all good. Despite not being the most exciting bout I’ve ever seen, it’s a shame to see it end with what looks to be a dislocated shoulder. Never fun to see a fighter call if off themselves like that, but I can’t complain about Team UK picking up the first win. That isn’t a thing in boxing, is it? I’m not keen to make it on either, let’s move on.

Fight two: Smith defeats Sjekloca by unanimous decision [118-111, 120-108, 118-110] (Prediction: Smith)

Well, at least I’ve got one right, that’s better than some of my previous attempts. You could see he had this one in the bag following the fourth, as, although there was some kind of resistance later on, the beating Smith put down in the last minute took something out of the big 36 year old. A deserved win with some big margins, let’s get to the next one!

Fight three: Saunders defeats Levickis by decision [60-54] (Prediction: Saunders)

Alright, so I didn’t know this was going to happen. To be honest, not much has happened. It’s not exactly the most entertaining thing I’ve ever seen, though I’m sure things will pick up following this one, so I can’t complain too much. Looks as though Saunders is trying too hard – just keep it simple and go with what works, the opportunities will come; I’m sure this would have been much simpler for him if he kept it cool. From what I’ve read in the last five minutes, he is apparently a good up-and-coming (28 year old?) British talent; a fairly standard win – good luck to him in the future.

Fight four: Quigg defeats Otake by unanimous decision [119-109, 119-109, 118-110] (Prediction: Quigg)

Otake steps out of his native Tokyo to take on Scott Quigg. If the commentator’s suggestion that Otake has a rib problem bears any truth, this could be over quickly. Update: Well, that didn’t really seem the be the case. That said, this was a good night’s work from Quigg – that big hit in the second, up until opening that gash further on, he was in control throughout. I think it probably should have been called the first time the doctor looked at the cut, but hey, I’m not a doctor. By the third time however? I’m just saying. Hell of an effort from Otake, take nothing away from him, but a comfortable win for the Englishman, who extends his undefeated run to 32 fights.

Fight five: DeGale defeats Periban by TKO [TKO3] (Prediction: DeGale)

Even with those horrendous Gooner trunks, I can’t look past DeGale for this one. I said on twitter that this one won’t go past the third and I’m sticking with it; as CAS once said –

Chopping them down like a force 9 gale, or like James DeGale

Great win for Chunky there, what a shot. Let’s get the next one.

Fight six: Groves defeats Douglin by TKO [TKO7] (Prediction: Groves)

Despite it taking longer than many had anticipated, Groves picks up the win with a devastating strike over the top to the head of Momma’s boy – the ref tries to let it carry on, but another twenty seconds and it’s all over. A good performance from Douglin, but you don’t come back from a strike like that.

Fight seven: Joshua defeats Sprott by TKO [TKO1] (Prediction: Joshua)

Even if I didn’t think Joshua would win, coming out to “Bound 4 Da Reload” makes you a winner with me. First round perhaps?

…Yes. 1:28? I think? Ref should have been in there sooner. This man is an absolute juggernaut.

Fight eight: Bellew defeats Cleverly by split decision [115-114 Cleverly, 116-112 Bellew, 115-113 Bellew] (Prediction: Bellew)

I don’t know. I’ve been going backwards and forwards on this one, and I still don’t know. I want Cleverly to win this, but I just can’t make a decision. I’ve gone for Bellew because he seems a lot more emotionally involved in this  – that said, now I think that’s going to be more of a hindrance and Cleverly will probably take it the distance. I’m not going to change, I’ll stick with the Scouse lad, but I hope it goes to the Welshman. Even with that headband. Actually, I take that back. An Everton themed entrance is a million times worse. Let’s go!

Mid-fight update: for me it looks as though Bellew is going to get gassed before this one ends. Those windmills Cleverly is busting out are hilarious. Round five underway.

Mid-fight update two: How is Cleverly still on his feet? Two to go.

Well, that’s over. A lot of spirit from Cleverly, but Bellew definitely deserved the win; can’t believe it was a split decision. I doubt there will be a third one after that show of respect at the end, but glad I witnessed it, regardless of it not being the greatest of all time. Good stuff guys, it’s been good to do something different! Speak to you all soon, I guess.

This is something I wrote a little while back on News Genius – I thought why not throw it on here, seeing as how it has been neglected as of late. I will be back soon – I know how often I say it, but this FYP is keeping me very busy. Hopefully I’ll be back sooner rather than later. Until then, here’s a short first half season review for Spurs. The second half will follow at the end of the season!


Spurs came into the first half of the season as a dark horse candidate for the trophy — while there were certainly others more favoured, few had written off the chances of AVB’s revamped squad — after losing prized asset Gareth Bale, the club brought in seven new signings — former keeper Erik Thorstvedt described the purchases as “[selling] Elvis Presley but [buying] The Beatles!”

While some of these signings became instant hits, it was undeniable the club missed the Welshman — AVB’s policy of slowly introducing players could be argued to be detrimental to the quality of play, as there was no-one to replace the record sale. While he continued to grind out wins most weeks, many were disheartened at the losses the club took — losing to West Ham and Newcastle could be seen as anomalies, but the losses to Man City (6-0) and Liverpool (5-0) were the last straw, as AVB lost his position as head coach at the club — which I should note, upset this moderator greatly at the time.

So begins the era of Tim Sherwood! This is to be continued — he had a terrific start, grabbing 16 of a possible 18 from his first games — the best of any Spurs manager ever. Yup. Good luck to you Tim, I hope you do well!

Alright, the new season kicks off (for us) today! No Bale or Vertonghen today, so there’s a slight concern; that said, our team should be strong enough to deal with these guys. I hope. They’ll definitely put up a fight, so let’s weather it. I’ve got no real big introductions here, I’ll just get into it!

  • 2 minutes: Nothing of note so far. Back and forth between the two teams, hope for some attacks some time soon. I just wrote this so this page wasn’t empty.
  • 3 minutes: Kyle Walker is so good around the box. That didn’t turn out all that well, but he’s a threat.
  • 6 minutes: Free kick Tottenham. These updates are pointless so far.
  • 8 minutes: Some quick build up play for Spurs, but Palace’s defence looks solid. Corner Spurs.
  • 10 minutes: Nothing came of the FK. Spurs 73% possession, foul by Paulinho. I’ve got nothing, I’m sorry. I thought Vert was out, but I think he’s on now. I’m really not sure, I missed the team lists.
  • 12 minutes: Great shot by Mousa, just over.
  • 17 minutes. Ward hurt for the Eagles, went down awkwardly after a header. Play has resumed.
  • 20 minutes: Rose gets a knee in a face, FK leads to a cheeky attempt from Soldado, doesn’t come to anything. I’ll comment when there’s a goal. This may be the last update until half-time because of that.
  • 26 minutes: Rose needs to keep calm. Don’t worry man, you’ve got this.
  • 27 minutes: Moxey looks strong. Very good performance by him, especially hearing he was a second-tier player last season.
  • 29 minutes: Nothing from the Spurs corner, Rosewith a huge header to get it back in, but nothing again.
  • 34 minutes: Great shot from Siggy, great save from the Palace keeper. I’m not going to embarrass my trying to spell the name. Still 0-0.
  • 39 minutes: Vert and Mousa looking strong as ever.
  • 45+3 minutes: Attack at the death doesn’t come to anything. 0-0 at half time. Spurs looking stronger, but Palace are defending very well. We’ll see what happens next half.
  • 48 minutes: Penalty Spurs!
  • 49 minutes: Soldado converts! 1-0 Spurs!
  • 55 minutes: Spurs continue to look strong. Palace with a corner that comes to nothing. Make that two.
  • 56 minutes. Capoue on for Dembélé. While I’d prefer to keep Mousa on the pitch, it’ll be good to give Capoue the run out.
  • 65 minutes: Palace have made some subs. Nothing happening.
  • 68 minutes: Great play, Siggy should have put it in, but was unlucky. Would like another goal before this one’s over.
  • 71 minutes: Palace looking much stronger with the arrival of Chamakh, still hopefully not enough to come back.
  • 72 minutes: Capoue looking strong. Big fan.
  • 76 minutes: Moxey looking strong again. Aside from the two handballs, he has been very strong. Great play by Palace on the break, but Rose was too fast for Gayle.
  • 82 minutes: Defoe on for Soldado for the last 7 minutes. Lovely if he grabbed a goal, would make me very happy.
  • 85 minutes: Close for Defoe, he was just outnumbered, unfortunately. Younes on for Rose.
  • 89 minutes: Lloris looking strong again. Two quick saves, very nice.
  • 90+2 minutes: Paulinho is the man of the match, three points

Well, there we go. Expected the win, was worried to begin with, as Palace had something to prove, but they looked strong in defeat. On to Swansea!

Alright, to be honest, I didn’t think I’d be doing this review. I assumed it was a certain thing Tottenham would casually stride past Sunderland to make to the final, presumably against Manchester City. Well, one half of that came correct. Unfortunately, not the half I would have preferred. After conceding a 3-1 loss against the Black Cats, we now find ourselves in a battle for third place. I can’t believe it either. Regardless of the strength of our squad, it should have been more competitive than that. Well, anyway, I couldn’t bare to write anything about that here, but I’ve began a breakdown on Rap Genius, for anyone that is interested.

I was worried, as my Sky Player and Sky Go are down, but I’ve got control of the TV, so this is back on! “The battle to finish third” – fantastic. Let’s get on with it.

  • Pre-match: Pitch looking better. Still terrible, but not waterlogged like it was previously. A lot of Spurs fans singing, good to see a community that are true supporters, a lot of Indonesian Spurs.
  • Pre-match: Lennon’s beard is swaggy, Tottenham have to coolest team. Hope there’s a big performance from the lads today. Defoe starts over Ade. No Bale or Vert. Still missing some key pieces, but a stronger team than the first match. Should be a win, but won’t take anything away from South China, they did well against City, so as my main girl Ellie Goulding says, anything can happen.
  • 2 minutes: Glad to have Lloris back. Great keeper. Got time for Gomes and Friedel, but Lloris is phenomenal.
  • 5 minutes: Nothing of note happened so far. A corner that didn’t amount to much. Danny Rose attempted a cross that may well have went in if it was on target. We’re looking strong.
  • 7 minutes: Beautiful sliding challenge on Sealy from Parker. South China with a corner.
  • 9 minutes: Good play, but didn’t amount to much. Walker is far faster than I thought he was.
  • 11 minutes: Goal! Rose with the deflected cross, I believe. Feel for their keeper, but hey, don’t want to come last on this one. 1-0 Spurs.
  • 14 minutes: Lennon doesn’t like shooting, does he? Should have more confidence in himself, he could have put one away there. Dembélé falls, giving a foul.
  • 16 minutes: Defoe through on goal, but it’s stopped by Joel. Great slide. Corner comes to nothing.
  • 18 minutes: HUGO! That’s all. Nothing special or anything, just good to see him. Friedel did very well in the previous game, our defence was either unlucky, or not up to scratch. Seems much better today.
  • 19 minutes: Lennon is so fast, that was incredible. Still. nothing of note since that run.
  • 21 minutes: Picking up the ball when it’s our free kick. Come of it, D.
  • 23 minutes: Walker was unlucky there. Their defender Joel is very talented. Parker got his on the nose. Ouch.
  • 24 minutes: Walker’s pace again! Unlucky not to get a goal there. Sorry to keep going on about it, but I didn’t realise how fast he was, that was crazy.
  • 26 minutes: Great pass by Parker, unlucky by Dempsey though, would have liked him to score there, but it didn’t happen. Sure there’ll be more opportunities.
  • 30 minutes: AVB is hungry for goals. You can see it.
  • 31 minutes: If Dempsey scored from there…
  • 32 minutes: Fantastic play for Spurs up until it got to the box.
  • 33 minutes. Defoe gets chastised for not passing enough, and this shows he probably should more often. Great pass from Defoe, got an assist, Dempsey puts it away. 2-0 Spurs.
  • 35 minutes: Didn’t need a time, but the Spurs kit is growing on me. I’ll get back to the game now.
  • 37 minutes: D. Martins played well! Nothing on the shot, but did well to get around the defense.
  • 39 minutes: South China are flopping everywhere, I’m sure half of these aren’t fouls.
  • 43 minutes: Walker with another nice cross, I’m liking what I’m seeing from him. Get out of here with that foul on Dempsey just there, too.
  • 44 minutes: Great free kick from Walker, deflects through, easy goal for Defoe. 3-0 Spurs.

Well, that’s half-time. Nothing ore to add really. 3-0 up, looking for more in the next 45 I’d assume. COYS and all that. The older bloke doing the half-time commentary is kind of refreshing, he doesn’t get over excited, he just puts his points across calmly. Working well with two people, as there’s a conversation without constant interruptions. Still, can’t wait for the regular season to come back. Completely right in what they said, more of the same next half. Even if SC get one, they’re not going to come back into this, so let’s just keep doing what we do.

  • 46 minutes: A lot of changes for Spurs. Not really surprising, would like to see more goals from it, with some fresh legs on the pitch.
  • 51 minutes: I assume nothing has happened. I’ve been away trying to win £100 of JME, but that’s over, so I’m back!
  • 53 minutes: Keeper gives it to Defoe, what did you expect would happen? 4-0 Spurs.
  • 54 minutes: Dembélé with a powerful shot, blocked. Imagine what the score would be with our entire first team. Still, not really worth thing thinking about, at all.
  • 57 minutes: Defoe REALLY wants another goal. Can’t blame him, a hat-trick would be very nice for him.
  • 60 minutes: Unfortunate pass from Defoe in the box, but he’ll get more chances, I’d wager. Not being selfish at all here, as he tries another that goes AWOL.
  • 64 minutes: SC looking much more eager. Not looking like they’ll come back, but a lot of credit for keeping the effort up non-stop.
  • 68 minutes: Three substitutions. With the limit of six, I’d love to see them just make six at once – half the team walks off together. Would be funny. No, it wouldn’t, now I’ve thought about it, there’s nothing humourous about that in the slightest.
  • 70 minutes: Close for Defoe!
  • 78 minutes: Good play from Carroll, look forward to seeing more of him next season.
  • 79 minutes: Defoe grabs his third. Well deserved, easily found their way through. Hopefully there’ll be more to come in the last 10.


  • 85 minutes: Another possible own goal on South China’s end there, but it was kept out. Free kick Spurs.
  • 86 minutes: Townsend puts the FK away. 6-0 Spurs.
  • 88 minutes: A pair of fantastic saves from Lloris.
  • 89 minutes: You have to feel for Martins, that was such a good late push.
  • 90 minutes: The final whistle blows, this one’s over.

That’s a wrap at 6-0 to Spurs. Defoe shows he’s still got it, you’d assume he’d be man of the match and take the ball on with him. A much better performance than that put in on Wednesday, no complaints. Let’s hope this kind of form carries over to the new season. A lot of respect for South China not giving in, putting in a good effort. Let’s go! I’m breaking the game down further on Rap Genius, if you feel like it, get involved! I’ll see you there!


Bonus picture! Here’s Fryers taking a throw in for some reason!

Alright, at the time of writing, I still haven’t finished my Money In The Bank review. I will at some point, it’s recorded on Sky+, but I’ve been busy, by my standards anyway! Right, in a recent email, I was reminded about the fantasy football service the the Premier League does. Well, I’ve made my team. Yup. How does that relate to Thom’s Reviews. I’ll tell you – it’s currently on Rap Genius where I’m annotating my choices; similarly to the Tottenham Hotspur squad review I did, I’m bringing it, along with the annotations, to Thom’s Reviews. Hope you enjoy this, let me know what you think of my choices. If you have any leagues you want me to join or anything (almost certainly not going to happen), let me know and I may join you! Oh, one last thing, the annotations will be updated as they are on the Rap Genius page. Cool!


4-4-2 formation – starred players are in starting XI.

Hart (Man City)*
Davis (Southampton)

Vertonghen (Spurs) (Vice captain)*

In my opinion, last season Vertonghen was as crucial to Tottenham’s success as Bale himself. Despite Bale being regarded as the second coming of Pelé (my words, not those of anyone else) due to his phemonemal season (yes, I was exaggerating) he is only one man.

Yes, I hear the cries of “one-man team” and the like, but that’s impossible, you need other players to get top-5 (that still hurts). Vertonghen is one of those men. Rightly regarded as one of the best defenders of the season last season, earning his place on the team of the…season, I don’t see that form dipping this coming…season.

A future Tottenham captain in my opinion, things are looking big for Jan the Man!

Luiz (Chelsea)*

I do not like this man. I was going to say I hate him, but that’s not fair at all, I can’t hate someone I don’t know unless they’ve done something terrible, and I don’t believe he has. Aside from his flopping around, like a football version of Ric Flair. Woooooo!

Nah, my jesting aside, I didn’t like the whole fall-over-and-smile thing. That said, he is a phenomenal football player. He looked impressive in the Confederations Cup, so I’ve got reason to believe that form will carry over to next season. Come on Bob, keep it up.

Baines (Everton)*
Aspillcueta (Chelsea)*
Baker (Aston Villa)

Gareth Bale (Spurs) (Captain)*

Is there any need for an annotation on this one. The best player in the league this past season, a player that, contrary to popular belief on the last day of the season, will not be leaving. Oh yeah, captain too. I want double points on everything this man does.

Snodgrass (Norwich)*
Routeledge (Swansea)*
Ramires (Chelsea)*
Johnson (Norwich)

Benteke (Aston Villa)*
Soldado (Spurs)*
Moore (Swansea)

I had completely forgotten about this. I did this a while back on Rap Genius, my views on the 2012–13 Tottenham Hotspur Squad. As it’s primarily my opinion, why not bring it over here too? So yeah, here it is. I finished this about a month ago, so some views may be a bit outdated, as well as the fact that it doesn’t reflect the players who have since been released, such as Big Game Gallas; regardless, here’s something to look forward to, I’ll likely be doing another one of these next season! Woo! Let’s get into it, I’ve left the appropriate Rap Genius links in and all that, so you can check it out with pictures and stuff. Yeah!


Manager: André Villas-Boas – Undoubtedly the coolest manager in the Premier League (as shown by this Facebook comment), the man has had a beautiful first season at White Hart Lane. AVB, or Luís André de Pina Cabral e Villas-Boas to give him his full name, had a great season prior at Chelsea but was dismissed at the end of the season; well, their loss was our gain as he seamlessly integrated himself into the club. His debut season with the Lilywhites was a nice one, and as he gets to know the club, he’s only going to get better and better!

GK: 1 Heurelho GomesGomes has been a notable absentee from the team this season, agreeing to go on loan to 1899 Hoffenheim on the final day of the January transfer window. After his first match, Hoffenheim manager Marco Kurz had this to say about Gomes’ debut:

Gomes has shown a very solid performance. Although he has only trained once with us, his aura was strong.

His performance didn’t decline, as he was made captain by his third match. Unfortunately, Gomes’ season came to a premature end when he broke his metacarpus on the 6th of April. Everyone is hoping he makes a speedy recovery.

FW: 2 Clint DempseyClint Dempsey is the interim captain of the United States national team. Not really relevent, but it still counts for something! Clint has had a very nice season, he scored his first, and the eventual match-winning goal for Tottenham in a 3–2 win over Manchester United. This was the first time in 23 years that Tottenham had won at Old Trafford. Clint also had a lovely, if unexpected goal to tie the penultimate game of the season up against Stoke. Got to give props to Deuce for that one!

DF: 4 Younès Kaboul – Unfortunately Kaboul only managed one appearance in the past season; not playing another game since he aggravated a knee injury following the opening match of the season at Newcastle. Hopefully he can get back to first-team form in time for next season — prior to this season, he was one of the most consistent centre backs on the team, and I’m pleased to say the signs are looking good!

DF: 5 Jan VertonghenVertonghen has been one of the most consistent forces on the Spurs squad this season, being named the Premier League Player of the Month for March 2013 and earning a place on the 2012-13 PFA Team of the Year. Despite being a defender, he’s not afraid to mix it up, netting himself 6 goals in all competitions this season. With a burning desire and drive to play, one thing is for sure, this season isn’t the last we’ve seen of Jan the Man!

MF: 6 Tom Huddlestone – An ever present threat in the squad, Huddlestone has had a good season, getting himself four assists over the the 20 Premier League games he played since coming back from injury the season prior. Now we just wait and see what the midfielder can do next season! Also, I’ve got to give a shout-out to his hair too! Big!

MF: 7 Aaron Lennon – Lennon has had a big year this year, scoring four goals and gaining eight assists, as well as being named captain for the first time in his tenure at Tottenham! Couple that with a contract extension to 2016, the future at White Hart Lane looks bright for Azza!

MF: 8 Scott Parker – Despite playing his first game of the season mid-December, ever since it has been hard not to pay attention to Parker. Actually, I’ll let William Saletan explain this, as he has put it much more eloquently that I’d be able to!

What Parker does instead is win games. He does this not by punctuating the match but by controlling it. He smothers oncoming attacks. He forces opponents off the ball. He orchestrates distribution out of the back, setting in motion a Spurs onslaught that will culminate 60 yards downfield … You can’t watch the game up close without noticing Parker.

“You can’t watch the game up close without noticing Parker.” Sums it up really!

FW: 10 Emmanuel AdebayorAdebayor. Where to begin? After playing for Arsenal, Man City and Real Madrid, he finds himself at Tottenham. Despite struggling to find his form during the majority of the season, he became a key player in the later fixtures of the season, securing a draw against Chelsea and a win against Stoke. Don’t worry Ade, I never lost faith in you.

MF: 11 Gareth BaleGareth Bale. Does he really need an annotation? If you’re on the Rap Genius page for Tottenham’s 2012-13 squad, you know who this man is. The PFA Players’ Player of the Year and Young Player of the Year and a member of the PFA Team of the Year; if you were to draw up who you wanted on a dream team of the past year, he’s likely going to be on top of your list.

Don’t ever leave us Gareth. AVB loves you, and so do we.

DF: 13 William Gallas (vice-captain) – Despite being vice-captain, Gallas has had little time on the pitch this season. Playing 19 matches and picking up a goal shows that he still has it though; we will have to wait until next season to see what the French defender will bring to the table!

DF: 16 Kyle NaughtonKyle Naughton has played a solid defensive position this season, giving the opposition a difficult time trying to score in his 26 appearances. With Naughton going on loan several times in the last few years, (to Middlesbrough, Leicester City and Norwich City) it was nice to have him back on our squad. We will have to wait see what he makes of next season!

FW: 18 Jermain DefoeJermain Defoe is a warrior. A striker on-and-off (for a season at Portsmouth) for Tottenham since 2004, the 2012-13 season was great for the play he recieved, scoring 15 goals, taking himself to joint-seventh place on the all-time Tottenham Hotspur scorers list. As well as that, he bagged himself another two goals for England too! Another year, another season coming up for Defoe, but one thing seems certain, he’s bound to add to his goal tally in the 2013-14 season!

MF: 19 Mousa Dembélé – Being one of Spur’s major transfers prior to the season did not put any pressure on Dembélé, scoring on his debut against Norwich City, as well as putting Lyon out of the Europa League with a 90th minute goal. Next year is set to be just as big for midfielder from Belgium!

DF: 20 Michael Dawson (captain)Michael Dawson is definitely a worthy captain of the squad; as Carlos Tevez stated:

I know he doesn’t play for England, but he is the best English defender I have played against.

You can’t really say much more than that. Scoring two goals in the 34 appearances he had this season, there’s not much else you can ask of from a defender. After he almost slipped away to QPR, we were fortunate to retain his services! Hopefully 2013-14 will be even bigger for him!

MF: 22 Gylfi SigurðssonSigurðsson is one of the most exciting players on the Spurs squad. Before coming to White Hart Lane, he was voted player of the season for two consecutive seasons; for Reading in 2009-10 season and in 2010-11 for Hoffenheim respectively, and his form certainly isn’t any lower here. The Ice Man has grabbed himself 7 club goals this season, including a beautiful lob against Basel.

MF: 23 Lewis Holtby‘Lucky’ Lewis Hotlby is a man of ambition. Playing 17 games this season, you can’t help but feel he is going to come back next season bigger and better. Despite his lack of goals this season, he has been a pivotal player at times, providing two assists; next season will likely see his eye for goal come into full effect.

GK: 24 Brad Friedel – Despite getting older, Friedel is still a reliable hand to have around the pitch, it’s less about age and more about experience in this case! Joining the club in 2011, he has extended his deal to 2014, so, despite Lloris being played more regularly as of late, there’s plenty of time for the American to get some more clean sheets, you know he’s going to do it!

DK: 25 Hugo Lloris – The go-to keeper for Villas-Boas this season, and with good reason; the French number one is also their captain and one of the most consistent keepers in the world. Lloris has had a great season, with some incredible saves. His play in December 2012 earnt him a nomination for Barclays Premier League Player of the Month for December 2012, as he only conceded four goals in six games. Next year is looking just as big for this man!

DF: 28 Kyle Walker – I genuinely feel Kyle Walker is a player than any team would be happy to have. Yeah, he might get heated a bit more than he probably should, but that just shows his passion for the game. Setting up six goals in his 50 appearances, his blistering pace, as well as his strength show this man is full of positives. Only aged 22, in a few years (if not sooner), he’ll be one of the most highly-rated defenders in the country. Mark my words.

MF: 29 Jake Livermore – Something of a quiet season for Jake Livermore this year, he played just 19 matches across all competitions, but don’t let that fool you, being called up for England in their 2-1 win over Italy shows that there is a great deal of talent in the man. Hopefully next season the 23 year old will get more chances to show it! We know he is commited to the team; after his goal in 2009 against Barca, he was asked what it was like to score against the best team in the world. His reply?

Score against the best team in the world? I play for them.

You’re right Jake. I’m still proud of you for that one.

MF: 30 Sandro Raniere – Similarly to Kaboul, Sandro’s season came to a premature end, picking up a knee injury against QPR. Again similarly to Kaboul, we can only hope this isn’t still having an impact by the time next season rolls around! Prior to that, Sandro had managed a goal and two assists, definitely a shame to lose the man early!

DF: 32 Benoît Assou-Ekotto – Something of a disappointing season for Assou-Ekotto, playing just 15 Premier League games this season, as a result of a knee injury after three games, making his return three months later. However, in the time he did play, he shows that the injury has done nothing but fuel his flame, with some great performances this season. Stating that he wants to see out his career at the Lane, the commitment, dedication and all-round play of the French defender makes him one of the most reliable and consistent players on the team.

DF: 33 Steven Caulker – In 18 Premier League games this season, Caulker has managed to score two, grab an assist and take 14 shots. Great stuff for anyone, that’s for sure, but for a defender, that’s an impressive tally! However, toward the end of the season, his appearances became more sporadic, hopefully we’ll get to see more of the big man next season!

MF: 46 Tom Carroll – Despite only being 20, Tom Carroll looks as though next season may be a big one for him. He made his Premier League debut on the 3rd of November, replacing Kyle Walker in the 79th minute of a 1-0 defeat at home to Wigan Athletic. Despite the loss, he had a strong showing in his first match and garnered a lot of praise. Hopefully next season, that form will carry over!